Fear of the Fire
This past Sunday my pastor gave a sermon that has haunted me and made me cry everytime I seriously thought about it. He has done this before with other sermons...But this one is different, much more profound to me personally and it has shown me just how much I HAVEN'T grown and how much more I need to grow.
His sermon was the last in a series titled "Through the Fire". Over the last three weeks he has used the story of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego as a basis for his sermons. Most of us know the story (found in Daniel 3)...Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego would not bow down to King Nebuchadnezzar's golden image so they were thrown into a furnace of fire. As we all know nothing happened to them while in the fire...Because God was there with them. The parallel Tim was trying to draw was that when we go through the fire we must remember God is always with us. This weeks final sermon was to help us not to be afraid of the fire, to know that God is with us through it all.
When Tim asked a question at the end of the sermon "How big of a blessing do you want and are you willing to go through the fire to get it"....hit me square in the gut. My immediate answer to the questions was...NO! I don't want to go through the fire God....the fire scares me, I prayed standing there at church. Something inside of me then asked...even if it meant you would get the husband you so deeply desire...and once again my answer was....NO! I realized at that moment how very scared I was of the fire. To say that I would give up on something that I desire so strongly to stay out of the fire, was something I wasn't ready to deal with. Thus the reason for my anxious spirit and crying everytime I thought about it.
I am afraid of the fire. I admit it. Unlike Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego I don't always come out of the fire untouched and unsinged (The satraps, the prefects, the governors and the king's high officials gathered around and saw in regard to these men that the fire had no effect on the bodies of these men nor was the hair of their head singed, nor were their trousers damaged, nor had the smell of fire even come upon them. Daniel 3:27). Although I know God was with me throughtout the fires and I have come out a survivor, I have come away a little broken and usually a lot hurt. I know that all of it is a learning curve, that God has good intended for it.... but it still doesn't stop the fear.
I know through a lot of prayer of the last few days and conversations I have had...I have to concede. I have to concede to go through the fire. I have to give up on the debilitating fear I have and be willing to go through whatever God wants me to. I know also I will not be given my hearts truest desires until I do. I'm not there yet, friends. I don't know when I will be.
His sermon was the last in a series titled "Through the Fire". Over the last three weeks he has used the story of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego as a basis for his sermons. Most of us know the story (found in Daniel 3)...Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego would not bow down to King Nebuchadnezzar's golden image so they were thrown into a furnace of fire. As we all know nothing happened to them while in the fire...Because God was there with them. The parallel Tim was trying to draw was that when we go through the fire we must remember God is always with us. This weeks final sermon was to help us not to be afraid of the fire, to know that God is with us through it all.
When Tim asked a question at the end of the sermon "How big of a blessing do you want and are you willing to go through the fire to get it"....hit me square in the gut. My immediate answer to the questions was...NO! I don't want to go through the fire God....the fire scares me, I prayed standing there at church. Something inside of me then asked...even if it meant you would get the husband you so deeply desire...and once again my answer was....NO! I realized at that moment how very scared I was of the fire. To say that I would give up on something that I desire so strongly to stay out of the fire, was something I wasn't ready to deal with. Thus the reason for my anxious spirit and crying everytime I thought about it.
I am afraid of the fire. I admit it. Unlike Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego I don't always come out of the fire untouched and unsinged (The satraps, the prefects, the governors and the king's high officials gathered around and saw in regard to these men that the fire had no effect on the bodies of these men nor was the hair of their head singed, nor were their trousers damaged, nor had the smell of fire even come upon them. Daniel 3:27). Although I know God was with me throughtout the fires and I have come out a survivor, I have come away a little broken and usually a lot hurt. I know that all of it is a learning curve, that God has good intended for it.... but it still doesn't stop the fear.
I know through a lot of prayer of the last few days and conversations I have had...I have to concede. I have to concede to go through the fire. I have to give up on the debilitating fear I have and be willing to go through whatever God wants me to. I know also I will not be given my hearts truest desires until I do. I'm not there yet, friends. I don't know when I will be.
posted by Sonya Terrell at
8:21 AM
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